Never Surrender?

During the second week of June–that’s the 11-16thElana Johnson is hosting the Never Surrender blogfest to celebrate her new book release this month. All you have to do is blog about a time you didn’t surrender!

This post should be easy for me. It’s been the theme of my whole life. I’ve faced many challenges and it all started from the time when I was very young and was sexually abused. That’s just too depressing to blog about so as I searched my brain about the other things I could post . . . and realized the best moments of my life have come by not surrendering, but doing the opposite.


Yep, you heard me right.

Throughout my life there were people I thought were my friends. Family I thought I could trust. There were times I felt like surrendering, even attempted suicide twice between the ages of 11-14. But I couldn’t go through with it. I knew I owed it to myself to see what all the fight was about. I figured my best days would be ahead of me because it couldn’t get much worse. Even if I didn’t understand much about God then, I sensed he had a master plan for me. When I finally surrendered my life to him when I turned 18, I knew I was right.

God says he has collected my tears in a bottle. I wonder how many bottles they filled while I was growing up? But trouble=triumph. I’ve never seen someone be triumphant without being in trouble first. Romans 8:28 says we know, not hope, not wish, not pray . . . that all things work for the good of those who love him. All those atrocities I survived I use as a catalyst to pour into my writing.

So never surrendering to me means surrendering it all to God. If I didn’t get something (during the past 3 years, that usually meant an agent or editor), it’s only because God has something better for me down the road. Going through hell and high-water is worth it if it leads me to the place God has for me. One of the hardest things to do is to believe God in transition and that’s where I am now. Transitions are difficult because you’re letting go of everything you’ve held onto. It’s a great feeling of vulnerability. Worry happens. But when it happens, I make the choice to let go and let God. I surrender.

What about you?

*This is a blog hop so be sure to make like a bunny and jump over to Elana’s page:):):) 


32 comments on “Never Surrender?

  1. Brilliant, beautiful, inspiring, encouraging, redeeming, and…well, powerfully written, too. Thank you for sharing the pain so we can even more fully appreciate the victory we see in your life, Jamie.


    • Yessssss, trusting God for sure doesn’t mean being lazy–completely the opposite. When I became a Christian, my life got so much easier and harder at the same time, lol.

    • I don’t think I’ll ever hear ‘winning’ again without thinking of Charlie Sheen. Ah, God bless ’em;) It’d be great if a guy like him would surrender it all to God, wouldn’t it?

  2. Too true, Jamie! I’m such a control freak that it takes me a little longer to step back and let go, leaving it up to Him. But what wonderful things happen when I do. Great post 🙂

    • Oh, boy . .. you don’t know the meaning of control freak until you’ve met me, lol. That’s why it was so obvious to all my friends and family when I ‘changed.’

  3. Great to remember. I think it’s equally important to remember God will take care of us too. We just have to put our faith in him. I’m glad you never surrendered. Smart lady!!

  4. It’s so true that sometimes we go through bad times or are passed up for a good opportunity because something better’s in store for us down the road, and we’d never be able to get there otherwise. Nothing in this life is worthless or a waste if it gets us to where we are now, and it’s not always for us to understand why these things sometimes happen.

  5. This is such an inspiring post. Unfortunately, adversity seems to bring out a beauty in art that is sometimes hard to see in the good times. Good for you, in finding that beauty and using it to fortify your faith.

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